Eye-to-Eye

One of the most charismatic of personal traits - and perhaps one of the most overlooked - is Connection...with a capital 'C'.

Too often we look in the general direction of the person or people we are addressing, rather than making proper eye contact and speaking directly to them.

Of course, when presenting to an audience it's impossible to make good eye contact with everyone, but even raking the audience with your eyes doesn't cut it as well as pausing and really looking at a sector of the audience. From their perspective it will feel very much as though you are addressing them and only them.

And what about the occasions when you're not actually making a formal presentation - just being yourself and going about your daily life? You're still onstage and pitching yourself to the world, so you really should be doing much the same things as when you ARE presenting.

Try this the next time you stop for coffee or sit in a restaurant for a meal: when your waiter or the barista or whoever gives you something MAKE EYE CONTACT and SPEAK TO THEM DIRECTLY.

I'm not talking about engaging people in conversations, just about breaking through the barrier of mumbling 'thanks' and looking in the general direction of someone who is helping you and instead actually taking a look at that person and thanking them properly.

Try it out, and you'll soon recognise that charisma is about much more than how much you spend on your clothes or how well-known you are.